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"I wish someone would kill me" BTS RM's Song In Distress

voomvoom 2017.12.21 15:48
RM. Photo from BTS Blog.

RM. Photo from BTS Blog.

 
On January 1, RM released a self-written song on BTS' official blog.

The lyrics reflect on the pain he felt.

 
The title is 'always.'
 
 
RM, posting the song and lyrics, stated "I worked on this early last year, and only roughly recorded the song. I felt pressured, emotionally burdened, so I jotted down how I felt, as I didn't want to forget such emotion. Now, to my relief, I feel much better." He added, "Still, it seems like a waste to let go of the song just because my feelings went away."
 
He further stated "I thought about revising the song a little, but I wanted to leave my feelings intact. When you're feeling down, sometimes the saddest songs can lift you up."
 
The lyrics go as follows:
 
RM - always (translated ver.)
One morning I opened my eyes
and I wished I was dead
I wish someone would kill me
In the deafening silence
I live to understand the world
Yet the world never understands me, why
No, exactly half is missing
It's trying to damage me
 
I miss me miss me baby
I miss me miss me baby
I wish me I wish me baby
wish I could choose me
 
I'm this desperate
Why can't it come true 
Always  
Always
Always
Always
Always (I lost my all ways)
Always (I lost my all ways)
Always (I lost my all ways)
Always (I lost my all ways)
 
When I meet God, I'll tell him
Life is the coffee I never ordered
I'll take him by the throat
Death is a Caffe Americano with no refills
Are you certain you're alive
Where's the proof 
I breathe out, I can see it
The window fogging up
 
You are dead
You are dad, but you are dead
Dead dad you don't listen to me
Dad please listen to me
 
I'm this desperate
Why can't it come true 
Always  
Always
Always
Always
Always (I lost my all ways)
Always (I lost my all ways)
Always (I lost my all ways)
Always (I lost my all ways)
 
It makes you realize that idol members, who withstand all kinds of insults, are only human after all.
 
Photo from BigHit Entertainment

Photo from BigHit Entertainment

 
Fans' hearts ached at the straightforward lyrics. Fans stated that there were a number of online haters against RM making downright rude, personal comments.
 
On December 1, during the acceptance speech of 'Artist of the Year' at '2017 MAMA,' RM revealed his true feelings. 
 
RM Receiving the 'Artist of the Year' award. Photo from Mnet.

RM Receiving the 'Artist of the Year' award. Photo from Mnet.

 
RM stated "We're no longer sad, we're not hurt. We stand tall, proud of ourselves." He seems to have referred to the emotional burden reflected in the song 'always.' 
 
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In response to RM's song, fans stated "As an ARMY, I can't listen to this song anymore. It breaks my heart." "Thank you for coming through." "I hope that RM suffers no longer." 
 
By Bongbong and Suwon Han voomvoomk@gmail.com